Death Solstice: Opening

Part One

★★★★

In my opinion, the purpose of a story’s opening is to set the scene, and the best way to do so is through imagery. Within the ten openings, I believe that number three had the better imagery as it revealed vivid colors that are easy to imagine as well as surprising contrast choices that are presented extraordinarily well.

The line that captured me the most was “black crows gorge on bright mangoes”. My first impression was that black crows and bright mangoes are not compatible as crows are known to feast on rotten leftovers or dead carcasses. The choice of the bird crow seems unexpected but it also foreshadows further into the story as crows symbolizes both magic and deception, whereas the mango fruit signifies an eternal love. This presents a pleasantly unsettling mood as the readers envision a pitch black splotch on a bright love story.

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

Part Two
★★★★

The colorless sky, no gray, nor blue, held the ardent, gleaming sun as its core; it mocked me. I felt the noon time ravens glare holes into me with their deep white eyes, threatening me.

A summers day terrorized my very existence; its heat enough to make me bawl.

I tasted the sweetness of my saliva accompanied by the common saltiness of sweat; an overwhelming yet familiar bitter sensation. Licking my lips, I laughed so subtly.

Then my body moved accordingly.

The cicadas sang to my steps as I waltzed past a blistering red light. Nothing could stop me; not even myself.

Laughing so coldly, tears streamed down my pale cracked skin, falling into an uncontrollable leer, trapped in a meaningless chortle.

A discriminating impact destroyed my questionable sanity. An indescribable rustic red stained the ashen reality I lived in; my walls crumbled under the pressure.

Exposed to a new world, I closed my eyes. Lying on a crossroad, I smelled the heat; a sour numbness choked my senses.

A scream; a crowd; a corpse; an endless routine.

Then I awake.

In a silent bedroom, an inharmonious heart beats. 00:00, June 21^st. It was the summer solstice; a death solstice.

Friendship

A train that runs impromptu; back and forth.

It holds surprises; sometimes worth a shout.

I stay behind and watch it wander north,

Or east, or south, or west; without a doubt,

I wait for its return. I wait and wait

Until the train brings home another friend.

From days to years, a friendship built so great

Was torn by blares of trains that marked the end.

Again, I wave goodbye to what was once

A flash of happiness within my reach.

The next from Canada, or Spain, or France,

Or simply separated by a beach;

My train will journey even on the sea,

To find a friend who’ll stay just steps from me.

Lemonic T

Just a simple girl and nothing else;

Living life, no factual motive shown.

Books that uniformly fit in shelves,

Paint the dullness; paint it like a clown.

JUST a SIMple GIRL and NOthing ELSE;

LIving LIFE, no FACTual MOtive SHOWN.

BOOKS that UniFORMly FIT in SHELVES,

PAINT the DULLness; PAINT it LIKE a CLOWN.

A Feline's Silhouette

A murky, pale moon masks a silhouette;

A silhouette so eminent to night.

With eyes that gleam, she waltzed a swift duet.

Her paw, so quick, leads dances, not a fight.

A Prison I Love

A wasteful city; pollution array.

A life, a dream, concealed in my dog days.

The beach, the trees, so cool; breezy.

Conflicting feelings surround me

But what else can I say?

At the end of the day…

Malaysia,

In Asia,

My cage.

My stage.